Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground beef!
—Megan Chappell
Q: What do you call a cow with only three legs?
A: Lean beef!
—Megan Chappell
Q: What do you call a cow that doesn't give milk?
A: A milk dud!
—Megan Chappell
Q: What is a cow called once she has had an abortion?
A: Decalfinated.
—Dennis Sosnovske
Q: How does a cow cut her grass?
A: She uses a lawn mooer.
—Joe Moorris
Q: What does a cow wear on vacation?
A: Bermooda shorts.
—Tree Frog Leader
Q: What do you get when you see a cow on the grass?
A: A high cow!
—Stephanie P.
Q: What did one cow say to the other cow when she crowded it?
A: Moove over.
—Donald Frazier
Q: What do you get when you toss a grenade into a herd of cows?
A: Udder destruction.
—Donald Frazier
Q: What do you call a baby cow?
A: A cowling.
—Peter Saunderson
Q: What is a baby male cow called?
A: A bulllet.
—Peter Saunderson
Q: What is a cow's favorite condiment?
A: Moosterd.
—Gavin
Q: Why do cows like to be spit on by other cows?
A: It makes them feel all cuddly.
—Gray Browse
Q: Where do cows do much of their shopping?
A: A cattlelogue.\r\n
—Tania R. Chase
Q: Where are cows sacred?
A: Cowcutta.
—Bob
Q: What does the average cow earn for her labor?
A: Moolah.
—Bob
Q: Why do cows have problems in math?
A: They can't cownt.
—Bob
Q: What soft drink do New England cows drink?
A: Mooxie.
—Bob
Q: What do cows drink after dark?
A: Mooonshine.
—Bob
Q: What do you call a cow by the name of Stu? A: Beef Stu.
—The Tim Guy
Q: Why isn't Elsie responding?
A: She is cattletonic.
—The Tim Guy
Q: What cars do cows drive?
A: Cattlelacs, of course.
—The Tim Guy
Q: Where do cows shop?
A: Cattlelogs.
—The Tim Guy
Q: Where do cows vacation?
A: Cattle-ina island, Cowlifornia.
—The Tim Guy
Q: How does a cow keep track of her dates?
A: She checks the bulletin board.
—ROBERT KORNSTEIN
Q: What did the old fashioned cow think of the new milking machine?
A: She thought it was utterly ridiculous!
—Tom Warkoczewski
