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• The doctor's computer files on sexually transmitted diseases skipped from "C" to "E." He had never seen the need to install a DVD system.

• The agitated doctor searched everywhere for a nurse, and when he finally spotted one carrying a cup of urine into the lab, he shouted, "This is not a good time to test my patients!"

• When the nurse missed the man's artery, she knew that the whole injection was in vein.

• The surgeon was unfamiliar with the new leg operation. It was too hip for him.

• Killing sick people does not set a very good example for the children of China. Will somebody please think of the euth in Asia?

• My plastic surgeon nose how to improve a person's face.

• When my novocaine supply ran out, I knew my number was up.

• If he were to terminate the tree-woman's pregnancy, the doctor would be the blunt of an arbor shun.

• You require treatment in a European health camp for the ingestion of large amounts of Vicks Vaporub. Please don't ask, "What's the camphor?"

• The therapist-in-training will lesson my pain.

• No, I don't have an A-positive blood type. Your records must show a type-O.

• It's impossible to operate on this woman with a scalpel. There must be some other way that I can opener.